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Speeding into the Loving Arms of Christ

Regular price $10.50

Buy 2, Get 1 Free — automatically applied in cart
Available as a weatherproof sticker, standard magnet, or extra-thick magnet.
Sticker or Magnet
For colder climates, we recommend Extra Thick Magnet.

āœ” Waterproof, UV-proof vinyl
āœ” Ships in 1–2 business days
āœ” Orders with 4+ magnets automatically upgraded to parcel tracking

Made in-house by our small U.S. team — no dropshipping, no mystery warehouse.

Description

Ā 

"SPEEDING INTO THE LOVING ARMS OF CHRIST" – The Ultimate Jesus Bumper Sticker šŸš—šŸ™

Listen up, highway heretics. You thought you were just out here breaking speed limits? Nah. You’re on the fast track to salvation. If you’re gonna send it, might as well send it directly into the Lord’s embrace. This jesus bumper sticker is here to let tailgaters know that you’re not just driving—you’re ascending.

THIS JESUS BUMPER STICKER LETS EVERYONE KNOW YOU DRIVE WITH DIVINE PURPOSE āœļø

You don’t need a GPS when you’ve got faith. Your speedometer? Irrelevant. Your passenger? Jesus, take the wheel. This sticker? Your highway testimony.

šŸ† WHY YOU NEED THIS JESUS BUMPER STICKER:

āœ… Premium weatherproof vinyl – Built tougher than your Sunday morning excuses. šŸš—šŸ”„
āœ… UV & water-resistant – Unlike your faith, this one won’t fade.ā˜€ļøšŸŒŠ
āœ… Bold, high-visibility design – Because sinners in the rearview need to see the light.
āœ… Strong adhesive backing – Sticks better than a sermon that hits home.šŸ”„
āœ… Easy removal – For when you get pulled over and need plausible deniability. šŸ˜‡

WHERE TO FLEX THIS HOLY DECAL:

  • šŸš— Your car – Because Jesus is your co-pilot, but He’s not paying your speeding tickets.

  • šŸ’» Laptop – Let the Zoom meeting know that you work for a higher power.

  • 🚦 Stop sign – You weren’t gonna stop anyway, might as well spread the gospel.

  • šŸŽ’ Backpack – For students who have been baptized in both water and bad decisions.

  • šŸ· Fridge – Apologize in advance for turning the last bottle of grape juice into wine.

🚨 THE REASON THIS STICKER EXISTS (A DIVINE REVELATION) 🚨

This isn’t just a sticker. This is a statement of faith. A public reminder that when you floor it, you’re just expediting the journey home.

WHO NEEDS THIS STICKER?

  • šŸŽļø Holy rollers – You speed, but with a purpose.

  • šŸ™ People who drive like they’ve already said their goodbyes.

  • 🚦 Tailgated too often? – Let ā€˜em know they’re tailgating an angel on wheels.

  • āœļø Anyone who loves Jesus – But also loves pressing the gas.

  • šŸ’€ People who take ā€œdrive-by evangelismā€ literally.

STICKER SPECS:

šŸ“ 8.5" x 3"
šŸ›  Material: Premium waterproof vinyl
ā˜€ļø Durability: UV-resistant, scratch-proof, and built to last
šŸ“¦ Finish: Matte for max heavenly aesthetics
šŸ’Ŗ Adhesion: Sticks eternally (or until divine intervention says otherwise)

JESUS WOULDN’T BRAKE, SO WHY SHOULD YOU?

You thought you were just driving. Turns out, you’re on a mission from God. Get your Jesus Bumper Sticker now and spread the good news—at 90 mph.

You pull onto the highway. The sun beams down. A voice whispers: ā€œSend it.ā€ You stomp the gas. Tires squeal. Somewhere, an angel facepalms.

Your speed? Biblical. Your driving? Rapturous. That guy tailgating you? Not on your level. This sticker is for the ones who know that if you’re gonna get there, you might as well get there fast.

šŸš€ Could you slow down? Yes.
šŸ™ Would Jesus approve? Also yes.

You pull up to a red light, and next to you, some dude in a Prius is giving you the stink eye. You can feel it—the judgment, the disbelief. He’s driving with the patience of Job, and you? You’re on a mission from God.

Suddenly, the light turns green. This is it. You launch off the line with the power of the Holy Spirit coursing through your engine block. The Prius? Left in the dust. Somewhere, an angel high-fives another angel.

Your driving style is biblical. You don’t just switch lanes—you part them like the Red Sea. You don’t just take off—you ascend.

But then—flashing lights. A siren. You pull over, roll down the window. The cop approaches, squints at your sticker, and sighs.

ā€œYou know why I pulled you over?ā€

You point to the sticker. ā€œOfficer, I’m just following the Lord’s plan.ā€

A pause. He stares at you. He exhales. ā€œCarry on.ā€

This sticker? Your shield, your testimony, your street cred. Stick it on your car, your laptop, your soul. This is highway evangelism at its finest. Order now and let Jesus take the wheel.

Because when He said ā€œI am the wayā€ā€”He probably meant the fast lane.

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Size, Materials & Care

For best results, please review and follow the full care and application instructions included with your order and available on our FAQ page here.

Sizing

  • Rectangular bumper stickers are approximately 8.5ā€ x 2.5ā€
  • Die-cut stickers and magnets are typically 3–4ā€
  • Sizing may vary slightly, especially on hand-cut magnet materials
  • Mockup images are not to scale and may appear larger for visibility

Materials

  • Made with premium all-weather vinyl
  • Waterproof, smudge-proof, fade-resistant, and car wash safe (stickers) when properly applied
  • Designed for outdoor use on smooth, clean, glossy surfaces
  • Apocalypse-resistant, within reason

Magnets

  • Standard magnets are 20 mil thick
  • 30 mil extra-thick magnets are available and recommended for colder climates
  • Magnets only stick to magnetic metal surfaces. Many modern bumpers are plastic, so please test your vehicle before ordering
  • Try your trunk, doors, or side panels if your bumper is not magnetic

Basic Care & Application

  • Apply only to a clean, dry, smooth, glossy surface
  • Clean the surface thoroughly before applying and dry completely
  • Avoid textured, plastic, rubberized, dirty, dusty, waxy, or low surface energy surfaces
  • For best results, apply in mild temperatures and press firmly across the full design. Do not apply under 45 degrees F
  • Wait 24–48 hours before washing your car after applying a sticker to allow the adhesive to bond
  • Remove magnets before car washes or extreme weather (snow/extreme winds)
  • Clean under magnets periodically to prevent trapped dirt or debris from affecting your paint

Important Surface Disclaimer
Frog Mustard products work best on glossy, smooth, clean, dry surfaces. Many coolers, kayaks, vehicle cladding, and similar items are made with low surface energy plastics, which can make it difficult for adhesives to bond, even with premium vinyl.

We cannot offer refunds for poor application, failed adhesion on textured/plastic/dirty/incompatible surfaces, or magnet incompatibility with non-magnetic vehicle panels. If you’re unsure about your surface, please message us before applying or purchasing.

Rewards

Join Frog Army rewards automatically with your order. Earn Mud Bucks to spend on free stuff.


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