Giraffe DENIER (they are FAKE)

Giraffe Denier Sticker – The Conspiracy They Don’t Want You to Know

That’s right. You’ve been lied to your entire life. Giraffes? Nothing more than a government hoax, cooked up to distract you from the real questions—like why every highway has a mattress on the side of the road, or why the moon looks suspiciously like a lampshade. You need this funny animal sticker.

The Giraffe Denier Sticker is for the truth-seekers, the skeptics, the ones who refuse to blindly accept the so-called ‘science.’ Because let’s be honest—have you ever actually seen a giraffe in person? Or are you just taking Big Zoo’s word for it?

Slap this sticker on your car, laptop, water bottle, or fridge and spread awareness. The world needs to know that giraffes are just long-necked government drones designed to surveil us from above.

Why This Funny Animal Sticker is a Must-Have for Free Thinkers

✅ Hilarious & Unhinged – Confuse friends, disturb strangers, and question everything.
✅ High-Quality Vinyl – Weatherproof, waterproof, UV-resistant—Big Zoo can’t erase the truth.
✅ Easy to Apply – Peel, slap it on, and instantly gain the respect of other conspiracy theorists.
✅ The Ultimate Funny Animal Sticker – Because if giraffes were real, why would their necks be THAT long?
✅ Makes the Perfect Gift for Chaos Enthusiasts – Know someone who loves ridiculous conspiracy theories? This is their new personality.

Where to Stick This Absolute Work of Art

🦒 Your Car – Because the highways are controlled by Big Giraffe.
🦒 Your Laptop – Let your coworkers fear your knowledge.
🦒 Your Water Bottle – Hydrate while spreading the truth.
🦒 Your Notebook – Every theory you write will now hold extra weight.
🦒 A Zoo Entrance Sign – We’re not saying you should, but we’re also not saying you shouldn’t.

You’ve Been Lied To – Here’s the Truth

Look, birds aren’t real was just the beginning. Giraffes? The next level.

You’re telling me there’s a creature that’s just a horse with a 6-foot neck and that’s normal? Nah. Sounds fake.

Here’s what they don’t want you to know:

🦒 No One Has Ever Seen a Baby Giraffe – Checkmate, scientists.
🦒 Their Tongues Are Blue to Prevent Photographic Evidence – Classic cover-up tactic.
🦒 They Magically Disappear at Night – Because they’re holograms, obviously.
🦒 Zoos Claim They Exist, But Who Funds Zoos? – The Government.

The truth is out there, and it has no neck.

Who Needs This Sticker?

🚀 Conspiracy Enthusiasts – Your sticker collection isn’t complete without it.
🚀 People Who Enjoy Gaslighting Others for Fun – Convince your friends giraffes are fake.
🚀 Fans of Funny Animal Stickers – This belongs in your collection immediately.
🚀 Sticker Collectors Who Crave the Unhinged – This is your moment.
🚀 That One Friend Who Will Put This on Their Car Without Hesitation – You know exactly who I mean.

Sticker Specs – Because Even Fake Giraffes Deserve Quality

🔥 Size: 8.5" x 3" – Large enough to make people question reality.
🔥 Material: Premium vinyl – Built to survive government erasure attempts.
🔥 Finish: Glossy – Because the truth should shine.
🔥 Durability: Waterproof, UV-resistant, and scratchproof – just like a government cover-up.

Why You Need This Sticker Immediately

Look. You can sit here, scrolling through your phone, living a lie.

Or you can wake up and start the revolution.

The Giraffe Denier Sticker is more than just a funny animal sticker—it’s a movement. It’s about asking the big questions, challenging the narrative, and getting kicked out of at least one zoo.

Imagine the conversations you’ll start. The debates you’ll fuel. The sheer chaos you’ll cause just by existing in public. That’s power.

And guess what? Power looks good on you.

How to Order & Spread the Truth

1️⃣ Click ‘Add to Cart’ – Because ignorance isn’t bliss—it’s a cover-up.
2️⃣ Check Out – Simple, fast, and free of Big Giraffe interference.
3️⃣ Wait for Delivery – We ship fast because we know time is running out.
4️⃣ Stick It Somewhere Questionable – Then sit back and watch society unravel.

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Sizing:
-Rectangular (bumper sticker) designs are approx. 8.5 x 2.5 inches
-Die-cuts are typically 3–4 inches
-Handmade! Sizing may vary slightly.

Materials:
-Premium all-weather vinyl
-Waterproof, smudge-proof, fade-proof, car wash safe
-Apocalypse-resistant

Magnets:
-Standard magnets are 20 mil thick.
-Upgrade to 30 mil - recommended for cold climates or aggressive winds.

Shipping:
-Ships in 1–3 business days from Washington
-We ship worldwide
-Free shipping available. Note that free third-party shipping is only trackable via EasyPost link in shipping confirmation. See Shop FAQs for more.

❗ DISCLAIMERS:

Mockups:
Mockup images are not to scale. May be larger in images for viewability. Colors may vary slightly.

Application Disclaimer:
– We can’t offer refunds for application to textured, plastic, or dirty surfaces, or for poor application practices.
– Frog Mustard products work best on glossy, smooth, clean, dry surfaces.
– Many coolers, kayaks, vehicle cladding, and similar items are made with low surface energy (LSE) plastics, which make it hard for adhesives (even premium vinyl) to bond.
– You assume the risk if you apply to a weird or incompatible surface.

👉 If you're applying to an LSE plastic and love our designs, message us — we’re happy to chat about higher-tack vinyl options for tough surfaces.

💡 For DIY adhesion help, many folks use Mod Podge, 3M Super 77 spray adhesive, or apply a little heat and pressure during application.

Learn more about surface energy and why it matters here:

🔗 3M Guide to Surface Energy & Adhesion

Air Bubbles (Magnets):
Small air bubbles under magnets are normal and usually disappear with time/heat.

Magnet Compatibility:
Many modern car bumpers are plastic and won’t hold magnets — try your trunk, doors, or side panels instead. Test a magnet on your car before purchasing. We cannot refund for those that do not check.

Longevity:
While our materials are built to last, extreme weather or improper surface prep can shorten product life.

Duplicates (Mystery/Misprints): Mystery and misprint packs may include duplicates. That’s part of the gamble. Misprints are subject to what is on hand that has been misprinted. If you do not want duplicates, buy a non-misprinted bundle.

Design Ownership:
All designs are original and created for humor/novelty. Parody and satire are protected speech.

No Custom Orders via Notes:
We can’t honor custom requests left in order notes for non-custom products. Please contact us before purchasing.

Stolen or Lost Mail:
Once your package is marked delivered, we unfortunately can’t replace lost or stolen mail. Please ensure your shipping address is correct and secure.