Criminalize Procreation! We have enough people!

Criminalize Sticker – "Criminalize Procreation" Vinyl Decal

Look, we’ve all seen enough. Overcrowded grocery stores. Traffic jams. Screaming kids at restaurants. Maybe it’s time to take a stand. This criminalize sticker says what we’re all secretly thinking—maybe, just maybe, we should hit pause on the whole “making more people” thing.

This high-quality, weatherproof vinyl decal is the perfect blend of satire, dark humor, and dystopian realism. Whether you slap it on your car, laptop, water bottle, or baby shower gift bag (bold move), it’s guaranteed to turn heads and spark conversations.

Because honestly? We’re full.

🔥 STOP THE BREEDING. SAVE THE PLANET. 🔥

Why You Need This Criminalize Sticker in Your Life

✅ Weatherproof & Durable – Survives rain, sun, and existential debates.
✅ Bold, High-Contrast Design – So even the breeders can read it.
✅ Easy to Apply, Peels Clean – No sticky mess, just pure social commentary.
✅ Guaranteed to Get Reactions – From laughter to deep, philosophical concern.

This criminalize sticker isn’t just a decal—it’s a statement about the state of things.

Where to Slap This Sticker for Maximum Chaos

🚗 Car Bumper or Window – Because traffic is proof we’re over capacity.
💻 Laptop or Tablet – Perfect for sparking debates at the coffee shop.
🍼 Baby Shower Gift Bag – Unhinged. Risky. Legendary.
🍷 Water Bottle or Hydroflask – Stay hydrated while preventing overpopulation.
🚪 Bathroom Mirror or Office Desk – So you can stare at it in silent agreement.

Wherever you put it, this sticker does the heavy lifting for you.

What Happens After You Apply This Sticker?

🚨 A LOT of double takes in traffic.
🚨 At least one person asking where they can get one.
🚨 More people reflecting on their life choices.
🚨 A boost in comedic nihilism every time you see it.
🚨 Possibly fewer pregnancy announcements in your friend group.

This sticker doesn’t just exist—it challenges society.

The Perfect Gift for People Who Are Over It

🎁 For Environmentalists Who See the Bigger Picture – Fewer humans, more trees.
🎁 For Sticker Collectors Who Love Satire – This one’s an instant classic.
🎁 For Friends Who Are Loudly Child-Free – They already agree.
🎁 For Yourself, Obviously – Because your car, laptop, and sanity deserve this.

This criminalize sticker isn’t just funny—it’s a whole mood.

Built to Last – Just Like the Idea That Maybe We Have Enough People

💪 Weatherproof & Waterproof – Rain, spilled drinks, or baby formula-proof.
🔥 UV-Resistant – No fading, no peeling, just lasting skepticism.
🛠 Premium Vinyl Material – Applies smooth, removes clean, stays legendary.

This sticker isn’t just a joke—it’s a conversation starter.

Final Thoughts: You Know This Belongs in Your Collection

🚨 One sticker. Infinite controversy. Zero regrets.
🚨 If you don’t get this now, you’ll wish you had when overpopulation hits critical levels.
🚨 Your car, laptop, and water bottle deserve better. They deserve this.

🚨 LIMITED STOCK – BEFORE WE ALL RUN OUT OF RESOURCES. 🚨

👉 BUY NOW & START THE CONVERSATION.

SOME STICKERS JUST EXIST—THIS ONE STARTS A MOVEMENT.

Let’s be real—humanity has had a good run. But between housing crises, climate change, and the fact that brunch reservations are impossible to get, maybe it’s time to admit we don’t need more people.

This sticker isn’t just a joke—it’s a message, a warning, and a reminder that maybe, just maybe, we should rethink the whole “infinite growth” thing. Whether you’re passionately child-free, deeply over modern society, or just love stirring the pot, this sticker says everything you’re already thinking—without you having to say a word.

It’s sharp, ironic, and completely unhinged in the best way.

WHAT ELSE CAN YOU EXPECT?

🚨 More confused reactions than you’ve ever seen.
🚨 At least one person nodding in silent agreement.
🚨 The inevitable “Well, actually” guy trying to debate you.
🚨 Friends demanding to know where they can get one.
🚨 A deep sense of satisfaction every time you see it.

Some stickers decorate. This one challenges the status quo.

🚨 LIMITED STOCK – BEFORE SOCIETY GETS EVEN MORE OVERCROWDED. 🚨

👉 ORDER NOW & JOIN THE FIGHT AGAINST RECKLESS REPRODUCTION.

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Sizing:
-Rectangular (bumper sticker) designs are approx. 8.5 x 2.5 inches
-Die-cuts are typically 3–4 inches
-Handmade! Sizing may vary slightly.

Materials:
-Premium all-weather vinyl
-Waterproof, smudge-proof, fade-proof, car wash safe
-Apocalypse-resistant

Magnets:
-Standard magnets are 20 mil thick.
-Upgrade to 30 mil - recommended for cold climates or aggressive winds.

Shipping:
-Ships in 1–3 business days from Washington
-We ship worldwide
-Free shipping available. Note that free third-party shipping is only trackable via EasyPost link in shipping confirmation. See Shop FAQs for more.

❗ DISCLAIMERS:

Mockups:
Mockup images are not to scale. May be larger in images for viewability. Colors may vary slightly.

Application Disclaimer:
– We can’t offer refunds for application to textured, plastic, or dirty surfaces, or for poor application practices.
– Frog Mustard products work best on glossy, smooth, clean, dry surfaces.
– Many coolers, kayaks, vehicle cladding, and similar items are made with low surface energy (LSE) plastics, which make it hard for adhesives (even premium vinyl) to bond.
– You assume the risk if you apply to a weird or incompatible surface.

👉 If you're applying to an LSE plastic and love our designs, message us — we’re happy to chat about higher-tack vinyl options for tough surfaces.

💡 For DIY adhesion help, many folks use Mod Podge, 3M Super 77 spray adhesive, or apply a little heat and pressure during application.

Learn more about surface energy and why it matters here:

🔗 3M Guide to Surface Energy & Adhesion

Air Bubbles (Magnets):
Small air bubbles under magnets are normal and usually disappear with time/heat.

Magnet Compatibility:
Many modern car bumpers are plastic and won’t hold magnets — try your trunk, doors, or side panels instead. Test a magnet on your car before purchasing. We cannot refund for those that do not check.

Longevity:
While our materials are built to last, extreme weather or improper surface prep can shorten product life.

Duplicates (Mystery/Misprints): Mystery and misprint packs may include duplicates. That’s part of the gamble. Misprints are subject to what is on hand that has been misprinted. If you do not want duplicates, buy a non-misprinted bundle.

Design Ownership:
All designs are original and created for humor/novelty. Parody and satire are protected speech.

No Custom Orders via Notes:
We can’t honor custom requests left in order notes for non-custom products. Please contact us before purchasing.

Stolen or Lost Mail:
Once your package is marked delivered, we unfortunately can’t replace lost or stolen mail. Please ensure your shipping address is correct and secure.