ALL NERVOUS, NO SYSTEM STICKER – ANXIETY STICKER WITH A CHAOTIC RACCOON

If you’ve got zero chill, maximum overthinking, and the fight-or-flight response of a caffeinated raccoon, this anxiety sticker was made for you. ALL NERVOUS, NO SYSTEM. That’s the vibe. That’s the mood. That’s a lifestyle.

This high-performance vinyl decal features a wired-out, possibly feral raccoon that perfectly embodies your mental state at all times. Designed to survive the elements, existential crises, and spontaneous panic attacks, this weatherproof sticker sticks to cars, laptops, water bottles, and anything else that needs a little nervous energy.

WHY THIS ANXIETY STICKER IS A NECESSITY:

✅ Weatherproof & Stress-Proof – Just like you, it won’t crack under pressure.
✅ High-Contrast, Maximum Chaos – Designed to stand out like your 2AM intrusive thoughts.
✅ Sticks Strong, Peels Clean – No sticky residue, just raw, unfiltered nerves.
✅ Guaranteed to Make Other Anxious People Laugh – And isn’t that what we all need?

Whether you’re vibing in survival mode or full-speed spiraling, this sticker lets the world know you’re doing your best (probably).

WHERE TO SLAP THIS STICKER FOR MAXIMUM IMPACT:

🦝 Car Bumper – Announce your mental state to other drivers.
🦝 Laptop & Tablet – Because your anxiety deserves desktop real estate.
🦝 Water Bottle & Hydroflask – Hydration is the only thing holding you together.
🦝 Notebooks & Planners – Document the panic. Laugh through the chaos.

Wherever you put it, expect knowing glances from fellow high-strung gremlins.

FOR THOSE BUILT DIFFERENT (BUT MOSTLY JUST BUILT NERVOUS)

🎁 Perfect Gift for Anxious Overthinkers – AKA, you and all your friends.
🎁 For Anyone Who Runs on Stress & Coffee – Which, let’s be honest, is everyone.
🎁 Sticker Collectors Who Love Dark Humor – Add some nervous energy to your collection.

This sticker isn’t just a vibe—it’s a cry for help, but in a fun way.

BUILT TO LAST – JUST LIKE YOUR OVERACTIVE NERVOUS SYSTEM

💪 Weatherproof & Waterproof – Holds up in rain, sun, and the occasional breakdown.
🔥 UV-Resistant – No fading, no peeling, no weak energy.
🛠 High-Quality Vinyl – Sticks strong, removes clean.

You’re holding it together with sheer willpower—this anxiety sticker is doing the same.

FEEL SEEN? GOOD. SLAP THIS STICKER ON & JOIN THE CHAOS.

🚨 LIMITED STOCK – DON’T WAIT. 🚨

👉 BUY NOW & EMBRACE THE NERVOUS ENERGY.

STILL THINKING ABOUT IT? YEAH, SAME. THAT’S THE ANXIETY TALKING.

Let’s be real—you were gonna overthink this purchase anyway, so let’s speedrun that process:

❓ Do you identify with a jittery, wide-eyed raccoon that looks like it just drank six espresso shots and forgot how to function?
❓ Are you one minor inconvenience away from full-on spiraling at any given moment?
❓ Do you thrive in a state of constant stress but pretend you’ve got it together?

If you answered yes (or hesitated but still feel called out), congrats! This anxiety sticker is officially your emotional support decal.

SLAP IT ON & LET THE WORLD KNOW YOUR DEFAULT MODE IS PANIC.

This isn’t just a funny sticker—this is a public service announcement for all the fellow overthinkers, nervous wrecks, and caffeine-fueled disaster gremlins out there. Let’s normalize the chaos.

So stop second-guessing, third-guessing, and quadruple-guessing—just add it to your cart, slap it somewhere visible, and embrace the absolute nonsense that is your daily life.

👉 ORDER NOW & WE'LL PROCESS IT QUICKLY, UNLIKE YOUR EXECUTIVE FUNCTION. 🚀🦝

F YOU'RE STILL READING, THIS STICKER IS ALREADY YOURS.

At this point, you’ve overanalyzed every detail, scrolled up and down twice, and maybe even opened a new tab to distract yourself—classic. But deep down, you know this anxiety sticker was meant for you.

It’s a self-own, a cry for help, and a badge of honor all rolled into one high-quality vinyl decal. So go ahead, embrace the chaos, add it to your cart, and finally make a decision without spiraling.

🚨 LIMITED STOCK – DON’T LET DECISION FATIGUE WIN. 🚨

👉 BUY NOW & ACCEPT YOUR FERAL RACCOON DESTINY. 🦝🔥

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Sizing:
-Rectangular (bumper sticker) designs are approx. 8.5 x 2.5 inches
-Die-cuts are typically 3–4 inches
-Handmade! Sizing may vary slightly.

Materials:
-Premium all-weather vinyl
-Waterproof, smudge-proof, fade-proof, car wash safe
-Apocalypse-resistant

Magnets:
-Standard magnets are 20 mil thick.
-Upgrade to 30 mil - recommended for cold climates or aggressive winds.

Shipping:
-Ships in 1–3 business days from Washington
-We ship worldwide
-Free shipping available. Note that free third-party shipping is only trackable via EasyPost link in shipping confirmation. See Shop FAQs for more.

❗ DISCLAIMERS:

Mockups:
Mockup images are not to scale. May be larger in images for viewability. Colors may vary slightly.

Application Disclaimer:
– We can’t offer refunds for application to textured, plastic, or dirty surfaces, or for poor application practices.
– Frog Mustard products work best on glossy, smooth, clean, dry surfaces.
– Many coolers, kayaks, vehicle cladding, and similar items are made with low surface energy (LSE) plastics, which make it hard for adhesives (even premium vinyl) to bond.
– You assume the risk if you apply to a weird or incompatible surface.

👉 If you're applying to an LSE plastic and love our designs, message us — we’re happy to chat about higher-tack vinyl options for tough surfaces.

💡 For DIY adhesion help, many folks use Mod Podge, 3M Super 77 spray adhesive, or apply a little heat and pressure during application.

Learn more about surface energy and why it matters here:

🔗 3M Guide to Surface Energy & Adhesion

Air Bubbles (Magnets):
Small air bubbles under magnets are normal and usually disappear with time/heat.

Magnet Compatibility:
Many modern car bumpers are plastic and won’t hold magnets — try your trunk, doors, or side panels instead. Test a magnet on your car before purchasing. We cannot refund for those that do not check.

Longevity:
While our materials are built to last, extreme weather or improper surface prep can shorten product life.

Duplicates (Mystery/Misprints): Mystery and misprint packs may include duplicates. That’s part of the gamble. Misprints are subject to what is on hand that has been misprinted. If you do not want duplicates, buy a non-misprinted bundle.

Design Ownership:
All designs are original and created for humor/novelty. Parody and satire are protected speech.

No Custom Orders via Notes:
We can’t honor custom requests left in order notes for non-custom products. Please contact us before purchasing.

Stolen or Lost Mail:
Once your package is marked delivered, we unfortunately can’t replace lost or stolen mail. Please ensure your shipping address is correct and secure.