Need to Pee

1. NEED TO PEE – Funny Sticker for Chaotic Drivers

   Ever pushed your bladder (and your luck) too far? Meet the NEED TO PEE funny sticker, a Need-for-Speed-style parody for people whose pit-stops are more urgent than their errands. It’s bold, shiny, and 100 % relatable. Because sometimes the finish line isn’t victory — it’s the next gas-station bathroom.

   You’re not racing for glory; you’re racing for relief. Slap this sticker on your car and warn everyone behind you that it’s go time in more ways than one.

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   Built to Last (and Laugh)

   Printed on premium, weatherproof vinyl, this funny sticker endures rain, sun, shame, and 500-mile road trips.

   • 8.5 × 2.5 inches — clear and readable at 70 mph.

   • Waterproof, UV-resistant, and fade-proof.

   • Vibrant motion-line design inspired by retro racing games.

   • Rated for 5 + years outdoors (longer than your bladder capacity).

   Each Frog Mustard sticker is printed and cut in-house using wizard-level precision, ensuring your humor stays crisp while your legs cross tighter.

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   Optional Car Magnet Version

   Commitment issues? Choose the removable magnet. Same chaotic energy, no residue. Stick it to your trunk, fridge, toolbox, or the nearest porta-potty if inspiration strikes. The 30 mil magnet clings tight, peels off cleanly, and survives panic braking.

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   Lore of the Leak

   “NEED TO PEE” was born mid-road-trip somewhere between civilization and disaster. The caffeine hit, the exits vanished, and destiny was written in vinyl. This funny sticker celebrates the unsung heroes of long drives — the ones who refuse to stop until it’s absolutely, cosmically, medically necessary.

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   Frog Mustard Chaos Certified

   • Printed in the PNW — home of rain, regret, and unhinged humor.

   • Weatherproof vinyl that outlasts your hydration schedule.

   • Ships globally within 1–2 days.

   • Guaranteed to earn honks, laughs, and sympathetic nods.

   At Frog Mustard, we make stickers for the chronically online and terminally dehydrated. Because comedy shouldn’t dissolve in the rain.

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   Why You Need It

   • Universally relatable — everyone’s been there.

   • Pairs perfectly with other Frog Mustard hits like “Drywall Fears Me.”

   • Great gift for road-trippers, gamers, delivery drivers, and anyone with kidneys.

   • Instantly turns any boring commute into a high-stakes bladder mission.

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   How to Apply (aka Cast Relief)

   1. Clean your surface.

   2. Peel the backing.

   3. Stick firmly.

   4. Whisper “I can make it” for +5 horsepower.

   No spells, no tools — just pure chaos. Removes cleanly when you’re ready to pretend you’re normal again.

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   Weatherproof Like Your Willpower

   This funny sticker shrugs off sun, rain, and existential dread. Laminated for multi-year durability, it’ll still look fresh when your bladder’s on its final lap. If your car dissolves, the sticker will remain — a monument to endurance and poor planning.

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   Frequently Asked Questions

   Q 1: Is NEED TO PEE available as a magnet?
   Yes! Choose between the classic vinyl funny sticker or a removable car magnet for temporary chaos.

   Q 2: Is it really weatherproof?
   Absolutely. Every funny sticker we print is waterproof, UV-sealed, and road-tested for durability.

   Q 3: Where can I put it?
   Anywhere flat — bumpers, laptops, coolers, bathroom mirrors, or emergency jugs. Live your truth.

   You live life in the fast lane.

2. You seriously need to find an exit.

The Frog Mustard Standard

We don’t make quiet stickers. We make statements. Printed in the Pacific Northwest with premium inks, cut clean, and shipped globally in 1–2 days. Every sticker is weatherproof, chaos-proof, and guaranteed to start conversations at stoplights.

Why You Need It

• Instantly relatable. Everyone’s been there.
• Makes even a boring sedan look like a getaway car.
• Great gag gift for road-trippers, coffee addicts, or anyone with a small bladder and big dreams.
• Certified Frog Mustard energy: loud, weird, proud, and slightly damp.

Application Spell

Clean your surface.
Peel. Stick. Floor it.
Whisper “I CAN MAKE IT” for an extra 5 horsepower and 0 rest stops.

Endurance Testing

This weatherproof vinyl lasts 5+ years outdoors. Rain? Fine. Sun? Cool. Public humiliation? Perfect. If your car disintegrates, this sticker will still be there — glowing with pride and desperation.

FAQs

Q 1: Is the NEED TO PEE design available as a magnet?
Yes! Choose between a permanent vinyl sticker or a removable car magnet for commitment-free chaos.

Q 2: Is it weatherproof?
Completely. This sticker survives heat, rain, snow, and your bladder’s panic countdown.

Q 3: Where can I put it?
Anywhere flat — bumpers, laptops, coolers, gas cans, bathroom doors, or your emergency jug.

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Sizing:
-Rectangular (bumper sticker) designs are approx. 8.5 x 2.5 inches
-Die-cuts are typically 3–4 inches
-Handmade! Sizing may vary slightly.

Materials:
-Premium all-weather vinyl
-Waterproof, smudge-proof, fade-proof, car wash safe
-Apocalypse-resistant

Magnets:
-Standard magnets are 20 mil thick.
-Upgrade to 30 mil - recommended for cold climates or aggressive winds.

Shipping:
-Ships in 1–3 business days from Washington
-We ship worldwide
-Free shipping available. Note that free third-party shipping is only trackable via EasyPost link in shipping confirmation. See Shop FAQs for more.

❗ DISCLAIMERS:

Mockups:
Mockup images are not to scale. May be larger in images for viewability. Colors may vary slightly.

Application Disclaimer:
– We can’t offer refunds for application to textured, plastic, or dirty surfaces, or for poor application practices.
– Frog Mustard products work best on glossy, smooth, clean, dry surfaces.
– Many coolers, kayaks, vehicle cladding, and similar items are made with low surface energy (LSE) plastics, which make it hard for adhesives (even premium vinyl) to bond.
– You assume the risk if you apply to a weird or incompatible surface.

👉 If you're applying to an LSE plastic and love our designs, message us — we’re happy to chat about higher-tack vinyl options for tough surfaces.

💡 For DIY adhesion help, many folks use Mod Podge, 3M Super 77 spray adhesive, or apply a little heat and pressure during application.

Learn more about surface energy and why it matters here:

🔗 3M Guide to Surface Energy & Adhesion

Air Bubbles (Magnets):
Small air bubbles under magnets are normal and usually disappear with time/heat.

Magnet Compatibility:
Many modern car bumpers are plastic and won’t hold magnets — try your trunk, doors, or side panels instead. Test a magnet on your car before purchasing. We cannot refund for those that do not check.

Longevity:
While our materials are built to last, extreme weather or improper surface prep can shorten product life.

Duplicates (Mystery/Misprints): Mystery and misprint packs may include duplicates. That’s part of the gamble. Misprints are subject to what is on hand that has been misprinted. If you do not want duplicates, buy a non-misprinted bundle.

Design Ownership:
All designs are original and created for humor/novelty. Parody and satire are protected speech.

No Custom Orders via Notes:
We can’t honor custom requests left in order notes for non-custom products. Please contact us before purchasing.

Stolen or Lost Mail:
Once your package is marked delivered, we unfortunately can’t replace lost or stolen mail. Please ensure your shipping address is correct and secure.