{"product_id":"biscuits-bumper-sticker","title":"Don't Hit Me! I'm Eating Biscuits \u0026 Gravy Off My Dash","description":"\u003ch2\u003e\u003cspan\u003eDon't Hit Me! I'm Eating Biscuits \u0026amp; Gravy Bumper Sticker\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eDriving requires focus. Unfortunately, so does eating biscuits and gravy directly off your dashboard like a feral interstate breakfast goblin. This \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003ebumper sticker\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e politely warns surrounding motorists that you are currently performing an important gravy-based operation and cannot be expected to behave normally.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eFeaturing \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e“Don't Hit Me! I'm Eating Biscuits \u0026amp; Gravy Off My Dash”\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e alongside a glorious biscuits-and-gravy image, this design is available as a weatherproof vinyl sticker or removable magnet. It's breakfast. It's defensive driving. It's probably a DOT violation.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e\u003cspan\u003eFunny Bumper Sticker for Gravy-Based Emergencies\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSome people put tasteful decals on their cars. Cowards.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThis \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003efunny sticker\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e is for anyone who understands that a vehicle isn't just transportation. It's a dining room, storage unit, emotional-support chamber, and occasionally a place to eat an alarming amount of sausage gravy while doing 67 mph.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eRectangular designs are approximately \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e8.5 x 2.5 inches\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e and handmade, so sizing may vary slightly. Mockups are not to scale.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eBetter yet: \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eBuy 2, Get 1 Free.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Add three eligible stickers or magnets to your cart and the lowest-priced one is automatically free—no code needed.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWeatherproof Sticker Built for Highway Nonsense\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eYour breakfast may be structurally compromised, but your \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003ebumper sticker\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e shouldn't be.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eMade from premium all-weather vinyl, this \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eweatherproof sticker\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e is waterproof, smudge-proof, fade-resistant, and car-wash safe when properly applied. Frog Mustard's outdoor-rated vinyl is built for cars, coolers, laptops, and other smooth surfaces.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eFor best results, clean the surface with water, dry it completely, and apply to a smooth, glossy, non-textured surface. Press from the center outward to reduce bubbles. Weird plastics, textured surfaces, wax, dirt, and other adhesion goblins can reduce longevity.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e\u003cspan\u003eCar Magnet for the Commitment-Averse\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWant the chaos without permanent commitment? Choose the \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003ecar magnet\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e version.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eStandard magnets are \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e20 mil thick\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e, while extra-thick \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e30 mil magnets\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e are available and recommended for colder climates or aggressive winds. Test your vehicle first: magnets stick to magnetic metal, not plastic, and many modern bumpers are plastic. Doors, trunks, and side panels may be better options.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eRemove magnets before car washes or extreme weather for maximum longevity.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e\u003cspan\u003eYour Dashboard Diner Deserves This\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eEvery Frog Mustard \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003ebumper sticker\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e is original, handmade, and created for humor and novelty. Orders ship from Washington in 1–3 business days, with worldwide shipping available.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eStick it on your car. Slap the magnet on your trunk. Go find a questionable diner.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eJust keep both hands on the wheel until the gravy situation is under control.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan\u003eNot sure where to start?\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Our \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003ca href=\"https:\/\/www.frogmustardstickers.com\/collections\/popular-stickers\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003ebestselling stickers\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/a\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e are the ones people can’t stop buying or arguing about in traffic.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"isSelectedEnd\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWant to make sure your sticker actually sticks and lasts? Check out our full \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003ca href=\"https:\/\/www.frogmustardstickers.com\/pages\/funny-bumper-stickers-for-cars-2026-guide-best-ideas\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003esticker guide\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/a\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e for placement, surfaces, and longevity.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eFor new drops, chaotic ideas, and stickers in the wild, \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003ca href=\"https:\/\/www.instagram.com\/frogmustardstickers\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003efollow us on Instagram\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/a\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e—we post the good stuff there first.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Frog Mustard Stickers","offers":[{"title":"Sticker","offer_id":54818122367255,"sku":null,"price":10.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Standard Magnet","offer_id":54818122400023,"sku":null,"price":14.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Extra Thick Magnet","offer_id":54818122432791,"sku":null,"price":16.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0807\/6712\/3735\/files\/il_fullxfull.8483839973_ps86.jpg?v=1787773123","url":"https:\/\/www.frogmustardstickers.com\/products\/biscuits-bumper-sticker","provider":"Frog Mustard Stickers","version":"1.0","type":"link"}